1. You were never called upon in times of distress,
Except we found the door of your generosity ajar.

2. And likewise, no vice was ever attributed to you,
Except you were praised for it, as it deserved acclaim.

3. You were never called upon in times of distress,
Except we found the door of your excuse ajar.

4. And likewise, no virtue was ever attributed to you,
Except it was praised, as you deserved acclaim.