أَنا لَستُ بِالحَسناءِ أَوَّلَ مولَعِ

هِيَ مَطمَعُ الدُنيا كَما هِيَ مَطمَعِ

I am not the fairest at first sight

I am not the first to be enamored by the Fair One,

She is the world's desire, as is her right

She is the desire of the world, just as she is my desire.

فَاِقصُص عَلَيَّ إِذا عَرَفتَ حَديثَها

وَِسكُن إِذا حَدَّثتَ عَنها وَاِخشَعِ

So tell me her story if you know it well

So tell me her story, if you know her tale,

And speak with reverence when you of her tell

And be still when you speak of her, and speak with reverence.

أَلَمَحتَها في صورَةٍ أَشهِدتَها

في حالَةٍ أَرَأَيتَها في مَوضِعِ

I saw her image, witnessed her grace

Did you glimpse her in a form you witnessed?

Beheld her beauty in its rightful place

In a state you saw, or in a place you found?

إِنّي لَذو نَفسٍ تَهيمُ وَإِنَّها

لَجَميلَةٌ فَوقَ الجَمالِ الأَبدَعِ

My soul does yearn, and she is indeed

For I possess a soul that wanders in love, and she

Above all beauty, flawless without need

Is beautiful beyond the most creative beauty.

وَيَزيدُ في شَوقي إِلَيها أَنَّها

كَالصَوتِ لَم يُسفِر وَلَم يَتَقَنَّعِ

And my longing grows, for she's divine

And what increases my longing for her is that she

A voice obscured, a vision undefined

Is like a voice—neither unveiled nor wearing a mask.

فَتَّشتُ جَيبَ الفَجرِ عَنها وَالدُجى

وَمَدَدتُ حَتّى لِلكَواكِبِ إِصبَعي

I searched the dawn and darkness for her face

I ransacked the pockets of the dawn for her, and the dusk,

Reached out my hands to touch the stars in space

And I stretched my finger out even to the stars.

فَإِذا هُما مُتَحَيِّرانِ كِلاهُما

في عاشِقٍ مُتَحَيِّرٍ مُتَضَعضِعِ

Bewildered they, and I bewildered more

But lo, both dawn and dusk are bewildered,

A longing lover, wavering evermore

Gazing at a lover who is bewildered and broken.

وَإِذا النُجومُ لِعِلمِها أَو جَهلِها

مُتَرَجرِجاتٌ في الفَضاءِ الأَوسَعِ

The stars in their knowledge or in their ignorance

And lo, the stars, whether in their knowledge or ignorance,

Trembled in the vastness of their expanse

Are quivering in the vastness of space.

رَقَصَت أَشِعَّتُها عَلى سَطحِ الدُجى

وَعَلى رَجاءٍ فِيَّ غَيرَ مُشَعشَعِ

Their rays danced upon the veil of night

Their rays danced upon the surface of the darkness,

Hope shone in me, though not too bright

And upon a hope within me that shines but dimly.

وَالبَحرُ كَم ساءَلَتهُ فَتَضاحَكَت

أَمواجُهُ مِن صَوتِيَ المُتَقَطِّعِ

The sea, how I asked, laughed in its tide

And the sea—how often I questioned it, and its waves

At my broken voice that could not hide

Chuckled in mockery at my broken voice.

فَرَجَعتُ مُرتَعِشَ الخَواطِرِ وَالمُنى

كَحَمامَةٍ مَحمولَةٍ في زَعزَعِ

I returned in thought and dream that swirled

So I returned, my thoughts and wishes trembling,

A carried dove in a chaotic world

Like a dove carried away in a violent gale.

وَكَأَنَّ أَشباحَ الدُهورِ تَأَلَّبَت

في الشَطِّ تَضحَكُ كُلُّها مِن مَرجَعِ

The ghosts of ages past seemed to conspire

It was as if the phantoms of the ages had gathered

Laughing on the shore at my desire

On the shore, all laughing at my return.

وَلَكَم دَخَلتُ إِلى القُصورِ مُفَتِّشاً

عَنها وَعُجتُ بِدارِساتِ الأَربَعِ

How many halls I entered in, searching

How often I entered palaces searching for her,

Those four corners, always emerging

And turned aside to search the ruins of ancient dwellings.

إِن لاحَ طَيفٌ قُلتُ يا عَينُ اِنظُري

أَو رَنَّ صَوتٌ قُلتُ يا أُذنُ اِسمَعي

If a phantom appeared, I said look, my eye

If a phantom appeared, I said, 'Oh eye, look!'

Or a voice rang, I said listen, my ear

Or if a sound rang out, I said, 'Oh ear, listen!'

فَإِذا الَّذي في القَصرِ مِثلي حائِرٌ

وَإِذا الَّذي في القَفرِ مِثلي لا يَعي

But those inside were lost like me

But lo, he who dwells in the palace is confused like me,

And those outside could not see

And he who dwells in the wasteland is unaware like me.

قالوا تَوَرَّع إِنَّها مَحجوبَةٌ

إِلّا عَنِ المُتَزَهِّدِ المُتَوَرِّعِ

They said, be patient, she's veiled from sight

They said, 'Be pious, for she is veiled

Except for those ascetic and contrite

From all but the ascetic and the devout.'

فَوَأَدتُ أَفراحي وَطَلَّقتُ المُنى

وَنَسَختُ آياتِ الهَوى مِن أَضلُعي

So I buried my joys and dreams forsook

So I buried my joys alive and divorced my desires,

Love's verses from my being shook

And I erased the verses of passion from my ribs.

وَحَطَّمتُ أَقداحي وَلَمّا أَرتَوِ

وَعَفَفتُ عَن زادي وَلَمّا أَشبَعِ

Smashed the cups from which I sipped

I smashed my cups before I had quenched my thirst,

Fasted from my food though hunger nipped

And I abstained from my food before I was sated.

وَحَسَبتُني أَدنو إِلَيها مُسرِعاً

فَوَجَدتُ أَنّي قَد دَنَوتُ لِمَصرَعي

Thought myself hastening nearer to her

I thought I was approaching her with haste,

But found myself nearer to my burial

But found I had only approached my own demise.

ما كانَ أَجهَلَ نُصَّحي وَأَضَلَّني

لَمّا أَطَعتُهُم وَلَم أَتَمَنَّعِ

None more foolishly led me astray

How ignorant were my advisors, and how I strayed

Than those whose counsel I did obey

When I obeyed them and did not resist.

إِنّي صَرَفتُ عَنِ الطَماعَةِ وَالهَوى

قَلبي وَلا ظُفرٌ لِمَن لَم يَطمَعِ

From greed and passion I did abstain

For I turned my heart away from ambition and passion,

Yet none succeed who do not entertain

And there is no victory for one who does not covet.

فَكَأَنَّني البُستانُ جَرَّدَ نَفسَهُ

مِن زَهرِهِ المُتَنَوِّعِ المُتَضَوِّعِ

I was a garden stripped of its flowers

It was as if I were a garden that stripped itself

Diverse, colorful, once towering

Of its varied, fragrant blossoms,

لِيُحِسَّ نورَ الشَمسِ في ذَرّاتِهِ

وَيُقابِلُ النَسَماتِ غَيرَ مَقَّنَّعِ

To feel the sunlight in its dust

To feel the light of the sun in its very particles,

Unveiled, to meet the winds robust

And to face the breezes without a veil.

فَمَشى عَلَيهِ مِنَ الخَريفِ سُرادِقٌ

كَاللَيلِ خَيَّمَ في المَكانِ البَلقَعِ

But over it came the autumn shroud

So a pavilion of autumn walked over it,

Darkening that place beneath its cloud

Like night camping in a desolate wasteland.

وَكَأَنَّني العُصفورُ عَرّى جُسمُهُ

مِن ريشِهِ المُتَناسِقِ المُتَلَمِّعِ

I was a bird stripped of feathers bright

And as if I were a sparrow that bared its body

Harmonious, shining, once so light

Of its coordinated, glistening feathers,

لِيَخِفَّ مَحمَلُهُ فَخَرَّ إِلى الثَرى

وَسَطا عَلَيهِ النَملُ غَيرَ مُرَوِّعِ

To lessen the burden, to the ground it fell

To lighten his burden, but he fell to the dust,

The ants marched on without parallel

And the ants swarmed over him, undeterred.

وَهَجَعتُ أَحسَبُ أَنَّها بِنتَ الرُأى

فَصَحَوتُ أَسخَرُ بِالنِيامِ الهُجَّعِ

I laid down thinking she was wisdom's daughter

I slept, thinking she was the daughter of visions,

But woke up laughing at useless slaughter

Then I woke, mocking those who slumber deep.

لَيسَت حُبوراً كُلُّها دُنيا الكَرى

كَم مُؤلِمٍ فيها بِجانِبِ مَفزَعِ

Not all is loss in this world of woe

The world of sleep is not all joy;

Beside the pitfalls some comforts glow

How much pain is there alongside terror.

تَخفي أَمانِيَّ الفَتى كَهُمومِهِ

عَنهُ وَتَحجُبُ ذاتَهُ في بَرقَعِ

From him it hides his hopes and pain

It hides a youth's wishes just as it hides his worries,

Veils his essence deep within its reign

And veils his very self in a shroud.

وَلَرُبَّما اِلتَبَسَت حَوادِثُ يَومِهِ

بِالغابِرِ الماضي وَبِالمُتَقَّعِ

His day's events with past and future blend

And perhaps the events of his day become confused

All a confusion without end

With the distant past and the expected future.

يا حَبَّذا شَطَطَ الخَيالِ وَإِنَّما

تُمحى مَشاهِدُهُ كَأَن لَم تُطبَعِ

Would that imagination's excess fade

Oh, how lovely is the excess of imagination, yet

Its scenes erased as if never made

Its scenes are erased as if never imprinted.

لَمّا حَلِمتُ بِها حَلِمتُ بِزَهرَةٍ

لا تُجتَنى وَبِنَجمَةٍ لَم تَلُعِ

When I dreamed of her, I dreamed of a flower unplucked

When I dreamed of her, I dreamed of a flower

Of an unreached star in the skies stuck

That cannot be picked, and a star that never shone.

ثُمَّ اِنتَبَهتُ فَلَم أَجِد في مَخدَعي

إِلّا ضَلالي وَالفِراشُ وَمَخدَعي

Then I awoke to find in my bedstead

Then I awoke and found nothing in my chamber

None but my loss and pillow for my head

Except my error, the mattress, and the room itself.

مَن كانَ يَشرَبُ مِن جَداوِلِ وَهمِهِ

قَطَعَ الحَياةَ بِغَلَّةٍ لَم تُنقَعِ

He who drinks from the streams of his illusion

He who drinks from the streams of his own illusion

Cuts short his life in useless confusion

Traverses life with a thirst that is never quenched.

ذَهَبَ الرَبيعُ فَلَم تَكُن في الجَدوَلِ ال

شادي وَلا الرَوضِ الأَغَنِّ المُمرَعِ

The spring left no brook but shadeless

Spring departed, and she was not in the singing stream,

No garden but fruitless and waterless

Nor in the lush, fertile garden.

وَأَتى الشِتاءُ فَلَم تَكُن في غَيمِهِ

الباكي وَلا في رَعدِهِ المُتَفَجِّعِ

Winter came, in its clouds no rain

And winter came, and she was not in its weeping clouds,

In its thunder no sorrow or pain

Nor in its agonizing thunder.

وَلَمَحتُ وامِضَةَ البُروقِ فَخِلتُها

فيها فَلَم تَكُ في البُروقِ اللُمَّعِ

Lightning flashed, empty I found its flare

I glimpsed the flash of lightning and thought her within it,

No lightning afire in the barren air

But she was not in the shining lightning.

صَفَرَت يَدي مِنها وَبي طَيشُ الفَتى

وَأَضَلَّني عَنها ذَكاءُ الأَلمَعي

My hands withered, astray went this lad

My hands were empty of her, though I had the recklessness of youth,

His wit led him stray from the wise and staid

And the intelligence of the brilliant led me astray.

حَتّى إِذا نَشَرَ القُنوطُ ضَبابُهُ

فَوقي فَغَيَّبَني وَغَيَّبَ مَوضِعي

Until despair spread its mist overhead

Until, when Despair spread its fog above me,

Veiling me, my place covered and hid

Hiding me and hiding my very place,

وَتَقَطَّعَت أَمراسُ آمالي بِها

وَهيَ الَّتي مِن قَبلُ لَم تَتَقَطَّعِ

Hope's threads were severed, once unbroken

And the ropes of my hopes for her were severed,

Squeezed by sorrow, my tears were the token

Hopes which, before that, had never been cut,

عَصَرَ الأَسى روحي فَسالَت أَدمُعاً

فَلَمَحتُها وَلَمَستُها في أَدمُعي

I saw her, felt her in my streaming tears

Sorrow wrung my soul, and it flowed out as tears,

When wisdom comes late, nothing appears

And then I glimpsed her, and touched her, in my tears.

وَعَلِمتُ حينَ العِلمُ لا يُجدي الفَتى

أَنَّ الَّتي ضَيَّعتُها كانَت مَعي

The one I lost was with me all along

And I learned, at a time when knowledge no longer avails,

That she, whom I had lost, was with me all along.