ضَرْطَةُ إبراهيم في البَرْبَخِ

كنفْخة النَّافخ في المِنْفَخِ

The fart of Ibrahim in the privy

Is like the blower's breath in the bellows

رِيعَ لها الأحياءُ من هوْلها

وأفزع الأموات في البرزخِ

The living shrieked from its horror

And it startled the dead in the intermediate realm

لولا دفاعُ اللَّه قد زُلزلت

بالأرض في أجبالها الشمَّخِ

Were it not for God's protection, it would have shaken

The earth with its lofty mountains

قد أحسَن اللَّه بأسماعنا

إذْ سَلمتْ منها فلم تُصْمَخِ

God has been good to our hearing

As it was spared so it did not go deaf

أنْذَرْتُ من في دراه مَطْبخٌ

ضَرْطَةَ إبراهيمَ من فرسخِ

I warned whoever has a kitchen in his house

Of Ibrahim's fart from a league away

الريحُ والنارُ هُما ما هُما

فَلْتُحْذَرِ الريحُ على المطْبَخِ

The wind and fire are what they are

So let the wind beware of the kitchen

أعاذَ من شرِّهما ربُّنَا

دارَ الأمير السيِّد الأبْلخِ

Our Lord protected us

From their evil, the home of the noble master

بخ بَخ لإبراهيم من ضارِطٍ

ذي ضَرْطة مَرْهُوبة بَخ بَخِ

Fart fart for Ibrahim the farter

With a frightening widely heard fart, fart fart

يظلُّ من يسمع أهْوالها

من صارخٍ ذُعْراً ومسْتَصرخِ

Whoever hears of its horrors

Will shriek in fear and cry for help

قلْ لأبي إسحاق بَيِّنْ لنا

فأنت في العلم من الرُّسَّخِ

Say to Abu Ishaq explain to us

For you are firmly grounded in knowledge

ما طَائرٌ ذو بيضةٍ ضخمةٍ

لكنَّه ليس بِمُستَفْرِخِ

What bird is it with a huge egg

Yet it does not hatch

ولِمْ حَكَيْتَ القردَ في قُبْحه

والقردُ ممسوخٌ ولم تُمْسَخِ

And why did you portray the monkey in its ugliness

When the monkey is transfigured and not transfigured

وما تشاجيك على شاعرٍ

بحشِّك الأبخر ذي البَربَخِ

What is your quarrel with a poet

With your most pungent invective and fart

لي مَنْجَنِيقٌ كنتَ في مَعْزِلٍ

عنها وعن أحْجَارها الشُّدَّخِ

I have a catapult you were safe

From it and its pelting rocks

فلِمْ تعرَّضتَ لها طائعاً

ولِمْ تلطَّخْتَ ولم تُلْطَخِ

So why did you expose yourself to it willingly

And why were you smeared when you were not smeared

عِرضي كعرضِ البَيْنِ يا ابن اسْتِهَا

ذاكَ الأرَثِّ الأنْتَنِ الأوْسَخِ

My honor is like a full moon, O son of disgrace

That foul stinking inheritance

إنْ رجع الطَّرفُ متى رِبْتَنِي

وأنتَ من عِرْضك لم تُسْلخِ

If the gaze returns when you have won me over

And your honor is not stripped away