طالَ اِنتِظاري وَعيل الصَبرُ وانقطعت
مِن كُلِّ شَيءٍ مَدى الأَيام آمالي
Long has been my waiting, and patience has wearied me.
All my life's hopes are severed, from everything they used to be.
وَخابَ ظَني وَضلّ السَعي وَانكتبت
عَليّ في صحفِ الأَوزار أَقوالي
My assumptions proved false, my efforts went astray,
And my own sayings against me, are written to someday pay.
وَأَدرَكتني مِن الآداب حرفتُها
مِن قبل تَكوين أَعضائي وَأَوصالي
I had mastered literature, since before my frame was built,
And before my limbs and members, were together soldered and gilt.
وَكلما اِزددت في نَظمي وَترجمَتي
تَفنُّناً جدّ بي جدبي وَإِمحالي
But the more I excelled in rhyme and eloquent diction,
The more barren and infertile became my condition.
فَلَيتَني كُنتُ نسياً ما خُلقتُ وَلا
رَأَيت ما هالَني مِن سُوء أَحوالي
Would that I'd never been created, nor lived to see,
The misfortunes and sorrows, that have stricken me!
وَلَيتَني كَنتُ قاطَعت العُلوم وَلا
أَتعبت في حفظها بَينَ الوَرى بالي
Would that I had abandoned learning, and never spent,
My time preserving knowledge, that my mind so sorely rent!
وَكُنت عشت بِلا فَضل وَلا كتب
أَجرّ ذَيل اِغتِراري بَينَ أَمثالي
Would that I had lived without glory, books or lore,
Dragging the train of my ignorance, amid the common and poor!
حَيث الشَبيبةُ وَلَت في لعلّ وَلَو
وَفي عَسى تَسمح الدُنيا بإِقبال
Where youth was wasted on "perhaps" and "maybe" and "if"-
Worldly hopes the young are granted by fate's gentle whim.
وَضاعَ عُمري وَما قدّمت فيهِ سِوى
شَيء تخف بِهِ كفّاتُ أَعمالي
My life passed fruitlessly, with no achievements made,
Save trifles my two palms could obscure when displayed.
وَهَل مَواعيد عُرقوب لمرتقبٍ
إِلا مَواعيد كَذاب وَمُحتال
Can an eager waiter trust the promises of a cheat,
Except with lies and guile he'll someday face defeat?
هَيهات أَبلغ ما أَمّلت في زَمَن
مِن شَأنهِ رَفعُ أَوباش وَجهال
Alas! I'll never attain what I hoped for in a time,
That lifts the wicked and foolish, the vulgar and slime.
أَستغفر اللَه مِن نَظم القَريض وَمن
وَسم البَغيض بِما يُعزَى لرئبال
I beg God's forgiveness for verse that was never wise,
And poison I called ambrosia, to the faultless and wise.
وَمِن مَديح غَدا ذمي بِهِ أَبَداً
فَرضاً عَلى مؤمن عَدلٍ وَتنبال
For praises that turned to dispraise, and shamed the just forever,
Becoming obligations no fair and thoughtful believer,
وَمِن أَكاذيب أَلفاظ بِها اِنتَشَرَت
صَحائفٌ طَيُّها قَد كانَ أَولى لي
Could ever fulfill or sanction, without sin or blight...
For lies and fabrications, spread in pages better unwritten,
وَمِن ثَناءٍ مجازيٍّ حَقيقتُه
تَهكُّمٌ عِند تَفصيل وَإِجمال
And hollow flattery, truthfully but mockery and spite...
For fanciful boasting that lent the coward valuation,
وَمِن حَماسٍ خَياليٍّ قَد اِندَرَجَت
بِهِ ذُوو الجبن في تَعداد أَبطال
As heroes in the ranks of the brave and bold of nation...
For decorative rhythms I used to sing vice's praises,
وَمِن زَخارف أَوزان نظمت بِها
رُكن الخَنا وَالعَنا في سلك أَقيال
And weave wickedness and blasphemy with elegant phrases...
For self-importance branches, whose fruits I failed to reap,
وَمِن غُصون اِعتِناء ما جَنيت لَها
مِن الفَواكه إلا فَرط إِهمالِ
Save waste, negligence and loss, I now remorsefully weep...
For arrows aimed at my opponent's heart in debate,
وَمِن سِهام إِلى نَحر المخالف قَد
فوّقتُها فَهوى مِن مَنصب عالي
That I positioned high but fell from their lofty place...
For eloquent ideas in my work that sought perfection,
وَمِن مَبان مَعانيها مهذبة
لَكنها مثل طَبل جَوفُهُ خالي
But rang hollow when put to test, devoid of true reflection...
For linguistic pyrotechnics, vaunted for eloquence sake,
وَمِن بَديع جناسات بَلاغتها
يومي لَها بِسُجود كُلُّ مفضال
When cooler minds would better truth and wisdom take...
For reckless fervor and zeal, leading far from the right way...
وَمِن غلوّ معاذ اللَه يورثني
ما يوقع المَرء في غيّ وَإِضلال
For wanton impropriety, that passed proper bounds each day...
For needless insults to please doubters proud and vain,
وَمِن مجون لعمري ما خرجت بِهِ
عَن الحُدود وَلا مِقدار مِثقال
That but bruised my soul, and no worthy object could gain...
For all I said and declared, no prize have I ever held,
وَمِن هجاء بِلا قَصد ظلمت بِهِ
نَفسي لمرضاة مَفتون وَمختال
No high position attained, no wealth my coffers filled...
No compensation given, for what falsehoods I told,
وَما مُنحتُ عَلى ما قُلتُ جائِزةً
بِها تبدّل إِعزازي بإِذلال
Save stalled promises and payments, deferred and withheld...
Often I was told to seek what station and wealth I desired,
وَلا قبضت لطرس قَط مِن ثَمَنٍ
وَلا حَظيتُ بِإنعام وَأَموال
With no coin or possession required to be hired...
I said God grants me my needs, without petition or plea,
وَلا أَخذت عَلى ما كانَ مِن كذب
كَفارةً غَير تَسويف وَإمهال
As He apportions all creatures their ordained destiny.
For He decides for all that lives, what weal and woe,
وَطالَما قيل لي سل ما تؤمّل مِن
مَراتب وَالتزامات بِلا مال
What riches or poverty, ages short or long bestow...
If He wills, with but a thought, He alters the very age,
فَقُلت إِني سَأحظى بِالمَرام إِذا
ما شاءَ رَبي بِلا سؤل مِن الوالي
And moves all time itself through history's turning page!
فَهوَ الَّذي لِجَميع العالمين قَضى
كَما أَراد بِأَرزاق وَآجال
وَهوَ الَّذي إن يَشأ يُذهب بقدرته
وَينقل الدَهر مِن حال إِلى حال
