كم النحت في جنبي والحز في متني — Mihyar Al Daylami

كم النَّحتُ في جنبيّ والحزُّ في متني

أما يُشبع الأيامَ ما أكلتْ منّي

How much chiseling at my flanks, how much gashing at my back!

Do the days not grow sated with what they have eaten of me?

تُلاحِمُ ما تَفريه فيّ بما فرَتْ

وتحسِمُ ما تجنِي عليَّ بما تجني

They stitch what they rip in me with what they have already ripped,

and cauterize the wrong they do me with further wrong.

أريها نُدوبي كي ترِقَّ وأشتكي

إليها فلا تأوي بعينٍ ولا أذْنِ

I show them my scars so they may soften, and complain

to them, yet neither eye nor ear offers pity.

أرئِّفُ منها بالبكا باردَ الحشا

وأحوِي بعُوذاتِ الرُّقَى ماردَ الجنِّ

With weeping I try to soften their cold heart,

and charm a rebellious jinn with protective incantations.

تسُلُّ جَناحي ريشةً بعد ريشةٍ

وتخلِسُ غصنا من فروعي إلى غصنِ

They pluck my wing, feather after feather,

and steal from my boughs, branch after branch.

مصابٌ ولم أمسح يدي من قسيمهِ

وجُلَّى وما نفَّضتُ من أختها رُدْني

A calamity, before I have wiped my hand of its counterpart;

a grievous blow, before I have shaken my sleeve free of its sister.

كأنّيَ لم يؤمر بغير صروفُها

ولا وجدتْ بالشرِّ مندوحةً عنّي

As though their reversals were commanded against none but me,

and they found no other outlet for their evil.

نُزوعَكِ يا دنيا وصدَّك إنني

سمحتُ بحظّي من هواكِ على ضنِّ

Withdraw, world, and turn aside; I

have yielded my share of your love, though loath to part.

تركتُكِ للمخدوع منك بخالبٍ

من الومْض مسمومِ الحيا صَعِقِ المُزنِ

I leave you to whoever is deceived by your deceptive flash

of lightning, with poisoned rain and thunderbolt-bearing clouds.

قليلٌ وإن سرَّ الرياضَ بقاؤها

عليه وما إبقاؤه وهُو المفني

Scant it is, though the gardens rejoice in surviving

through it; what can it preserve, when it is the destroyer?

هجرتِك لما صار وصلكِ سُبّةً

وخِفتُكِ لمّا أن دُهيتُ من الأمنِ

I forsook you when union with you became a disgrace,

and feared you when safety itself brought disaster upon me.

وإنك للحَسناءُ وجها وشارةً

ولكنه غدرٌ يشوِّهُ بالحسنِ

You are indeed beautiful in face and adornment,

yet it is treachery that makes beauty hideous.

فطنتُ لرأي الحزم فيكِ وهمّتي

تشيرُ إلى رأي الضراعةِ والوهْنِ

I discerned what prudence counseled concerning you, while my ambition

pointed toward abasement and weakness.

أُصادَى وتُرمَى صفحتي بخفيّةٍ

تُوَلَّجُ أبوابَ النفوس بلا إذنِ

I am cajoled, while my side is struck by a hidden blow

that is slipped through the doors of souls without permission.

إذا ما اتقيتُ السهمَ منها بجِلدتي

تنفَّستُه من جلد خِلِّيَ أو خِدْني

If I ward off your arrow with my own skin,

I breathe it in through my friend's skin, or my companion's.

وأعلم إن ماطلت بالودّ أنني

على قَرَبٍ لا بدَّ تُدلَى له شَنِّي

And I know, if you put me off with affection, that I

am nearing a watering place where my worn waterskin must be lowered.

فلو كنتُ عَضباً قد فنِيتُ تفلّلاً

ولوكنتُ هَضْباً مال ركني على ركني

Were I a sharp sword, chipping would have worn me away;

were I a mountain, one buttress of mine would have fallen upon another.

أيعلم ما أدَّتْ حقيبةُ رحلهِ

من الشرِّ ناعٍ ليته لم يبلِّغْني

Does he know what the bag upon his saddle brought

of evil, that death-messenger? Would that he had never told me!

نعَى ثمّ ألقاها إليّ صحيفةً

فضضت إِشاحَيْها وفضَّتْ عُرَى جفني

He announced the death, then cast me a letter;

I broke its two ties, and it broke the bonds of my eyelid.

بدأتُ بها واليومُ أصبحَ مشمساً

وأنهيتُها والعينُ بالدمع في دَجْنِ

I began it when the day had dawned sunny,

and finished it with my eye clouded by tears.

كَنَى باسم عِزِّي أنه اغتاله الردى

ونفسي عَنَى لو كان يعلَم من يكني

He spoke of my glory, saying death had slain him;

he meant my own soul, had he known whom he was alluding to.

خليلي إذا اعتلَّ الخليلُ وصاحبي ال

صريحُ إذا ملَّ الفتى صحبةَ الهُجْنِ

My friend when other friends plead excuses, and my companion, the

purebred, when a man tires of mongrel company.

فُجعتُ به غضَّ الشمائل والهوى

مسنَّ الحجا والفضلِ مقتبلَ السنِّ

I was bereaved of him, fresh in character and affection,

mature in wisdom and excellence, yet in youth's first bloom.

على حين قامت للمنى فيه سُوقُها

وحقَّت شهاداتُ المخايلِ والظنِّ

Just when hopes in him had found a thriving market,

and the testimony of promise and expectation proved true.

ورشّحتُه يرمِي الشواكلَ رأيُهُ

ويُغني وأطرافُ الأسنّة لا تُغني

I had readied him, his judgment striking the vital points,

and availing where spearpoints were of no avail,

وللخصم يستشري عليَّ سفاهةً

وذي الودِّ يستعلي حؤولا ويستسني

against the foe who runs rampant in his folly toward me,

and the friend who grows haughty and fickle, demanding favors;

وللكاتم الشحناء يرهبُ حدّه

إذا اهتزَّ دوني والمكاشفِ بالضَّغنِ

against him who hides his hatred, fearing his edge

when brandished in my defense, and him who openly declares his rancor.

وقام بما حمّلتُه ناهضَ الذُّرَى

خفيفَ الصليفِ تامكَ الجنبِ والمتنِ

He rose to the burdens I laid on him, lofty of crest,

slender of neck, high in flank and back.

وتمَّ فسمَّتهُ النجابةُ كاملا

إذا مال في فنّ بها مار في فنِّ

He reached perfection, and nobility named him complete;

when through it he turned to one art, he moved into another.

وصرتُ إذا طالبتُ دهري بمثله

طلبتُ وِلاد العُقم من أظهر العُنِّ

So when I asked my age for another like him,

I sought offspring of barren women from impotent loins.

ينمّ ارتيادي فيه عن حسن ما أرى

ويفصح غرسي فيه عن طيب ما أجني

My choice of him revealed how fair my vision was,

and my planting in him declared how sweet my harvest.

ولم أدرِ أن الموتَ فيه مُراصدي

يقرِّفُ ما آسو ويهدِمُ ما أبني

I did not know that death lay in wait for me in him,

reopening what I healed and demolishing what I built.

أبا قاسم لبَّيت لو كنتَ سامعا

غراما بصوتي وارتياحا إلى لَحني

Abu Qasim, you would have answered, had you heard me,

for love of my voice and delight in my melody.

على أيّ سمتٍ تقتفيك نشيدتي

وأيّ مسيل أقتري عنك أو رَعْنِ

In what direction can my song follow you?

Along what watercourse or mountain spur should I trace you?

وهل ينقُلُ السُّفَّارُ أخبارَ هالكٍ

فأَستقربَ الأسفارَ عنك وأَستدني

Do travelers carry news of the dead,

so I could deem journeys in search of you short and near?

ترقَّبتُ يوماً من لقائك نجتني

ثمارَ الإياب الحلوِ من غصنه اللَّدْنِ

I awaited a day of meeting you, when we would gather

the sweet fruits of homecoming from its supple branch.

وداريتُ عيني عنكَ بالوعد والمنى

مماطلَة المأسور يطمَع في المنِّ

I soothed my eye for your absence with promises and hopes,

putting it off like a captive still hoping for release.

كأنّ فراخَ الوُكْنِ بين جوانحي

أقمنَ وطار الأمّهاتُ عن الوُكْنِ

As though nestlings, lodged between my ribs,

had stayed behind while their mothers flew from the nests.

أغار عليّ الدهرُ فيك ولم أخَلْ

نزولَك منقادا بشلٍّ ولا شَنِّ

Time raided me through you, and I never imagined

your surrender, led away by a rout or raid.

فلا أنت قُدَّامَ الركاب طليعةٌ

لعيني ولا مستأخر أثرَ الظُّعْنِ

You are neither ahead of the caravan, an advance scout

for my eye, nor lagging in the wake of departing travelers.

طحَا بك بُعدٌ لا قرابةَ بعده

مسافةَ مقطوع المدَى غَلِقِ الرهنِ

A remoteness swept you away, with no nearness after it,

the distance of one whose course is ended, whose pledge is forfeited.

مجاورَ قومٍ لا تجاوُرَ بينهم

تضاحَوا وهم تحتَ الأظلّةِ والكِنِّ

Neighbor to a people with no neighborliness among them,

they lie exposed, though beneath shade and shelter.

بدائدَ أُلَّافٍ كأنّ قبورَهم

جواثمَ بالبيداءِ معقورةُ البُدْنِ

Scattered companions, as though their graves

were slaughtered sacrificial camels crouching in the desert.

بعيدٌ على وِرد الحياضِ التقاؤهم

وإن هم تدانَوا في المنازل والقَطنِ

Remote is their meeting at the pools to drink,

though they lie close in their dwellings and abode.

غريبٌ وثاوٍ بين جُدران أهلهِ

لهم قشفُ البيداءِ في ترفِ المُدْنِ

A stranger, yet dwelling within his family's walls;

they have the desert's privation amid the cities' luxury.

عَذيريَ من أفواهِ دِجلةَ بُدِّلتْ

من الغدِقِ السلسال بالراكدِ الأجْنِ

Who will take my part against the mouths of the Tigris, turned

from abundant, limpid flow to stagnant, fetid water?

شربتُ وقد غالتك دمعي وماءها

فما افترقا لي في الملوحة والسَّخْنِ

After it had snatched you away, I drank my tears and its water,

and found them no different in saltiness and heat.

لصافحتُ من أمواجها كفَّ غادرٍ

سواء عليها الغَمزُ في الرَّخْصِ والشَّثْنِ

In its waves, I would have clasped a traitor's hand,

indifferent whether it squeezed the tender or the calloused.

روِيتَ بها حتى غدا الريُّ لهفةً

وصافقتَها للفوز فانقدتَ للغَبنِ

You drank your fill of it until satiety became anguish,

and bargained with it for gain, only to yield to loss.

وما خلتُ وِرد الماءِ بابا إلى الصدى

ولا أنّ عومَ البحر ضربٌ من الدفنِ

I never thought going down to water a gateway to thirst,

nor swimming in the sea a kind of burial.

جرت بالقذى من بعد يومك والأذى

ولا ذُكرتْ إلا على السبِّ واللعنِ

After your day, it flowed with filth and harm,

and was spoken of only with abuse and curses.

وضاقت بها حافَاتُها وتملَّأتْ

جنادلَ تكبو بالقلوعِ وبالسُّفنِ

Its banks grew too narrow for it, and it filled

with boulders that trip sails and ships.

ويا ليت شِعرَ الحزم كيف ركبتَها

على غَررٍ من لينِ أظهرها الخُشْنِ

Would that prudence knew how you came to ride it,

in peril from the seeming softness of its rough backs.

وما كنتَ ممن يأكلُ الطيشُ حلمَهُ

ولا من فريس العجزِ عندي ولا الأفْنِ

You were not one whose forbearance recklessness devours,

nor, to my mind, prey to helplessness or feeble judgment.

ذممتك فيها بالشجاعة مقدِماً

ولو قد جبُنتَ اخترتُ حمدي على الجُبنِ

I blamed you for the courage with which you ventured on it;

had you been cowardly, I would have chosen to praise that cowardice.

هوَيتَ إليها مطلَقا حان أسرُهُ

فلم يغنَ بالأُفحوصِ عنها ولا الرَّشْنِ

You fell toward it, free, when your hour of capture came;

neither nesting hollow nor snare availed you against it.

ولو أنه العادي عليك ابنُ لأمةٍ

تسربلَ أو ذو غابة داميَ الحِضْنِ

Had your assailant been a son of armor,

cloaked in it, or a forest beast with bloodied flank,

وقَيتُك لا أخشى يدَ الليث مالئاً

محاجرَه مني ولا صولةَ القِرنِ

I would have shielded you, not fearing a lion's paw as I filled

its gaze with my presence, nor an adversary's charge.

وقامتْ رِجالاتٌ فمدَّت أكفَّها

طوالاً فذبتَّ عنك بالضرب والطعن

Men of stature would have risen and stretched out their hands

far, and you would have fought them off with blows and thrusts.

وألحمتُها شعواءَ يرفُلُ نقعُها

على العلَق المحمرِّ في الأزُرِ الدُّكْنِ

I would have embroiled them in a savage battle, its dust trailing

over red clotted blood on dark waistcloths.

يصُكُّ الكماةَ بالكماةِ مِصاعُها

خِلاطا وترمي بالحجورِ على الحُصْنِ

Its melee dashes armored champions against champions,

in mingled combat, flinging mares against stallions.

ولكن نَعانِي فيك من لا أروعُه

بسفك دمٍ يحميك منه ولا جفنِ

But he who proclaimed my death in yours cannot be cowed

by bloodshed that could shield you from him, nor by a sword's sheath.

هو الفاجع النسرَ المحلِّقَ بابنه

على الطود والضبَّ المنقَّبَ بالمكْنِ

He robs the soaring eagle of its young

upon the mountain, and the burrowing lizard of its eggs;

ووالجُ ما بين الفتى وإزارِه

بلا وازعٍ ينهَى ولا رادعٍ يَثني

he slips between a young man and his waistcloth,

with no restrainer to forbid him, no deterrent to turn him back.

رقى ما رقى الحاوون لسعةَ نابه

وطبُّوا فلا بالسحر جاءوا ولا الكَهْنِ

The charmers chanted all their charms against his fang's sting,

and tried their cures, but brought neither magic nor divination.

أذمُّ إليك العيشَ بعدك إنه

بُضيعَة لا المُغني المفيدِ ولا المقني

I condemn life to you after your death: it is

a paltry stock, neither enriching nor profitable nor a source of wealth.

أهيم ولم يظفَرْ بعفراءَ عُروةٌ

وأشكو ولم يقدِر جميلٌ على بُثنِ

I wander love-mad, though Urwa never won Afra,

and lament, though Jamil could never attain Buthn.

كأنيَ لم أنظر من الجوّ في ملاً

سواك ولم أُسرع من الأرض في صحنِ

As though I had never looked, within the sky's expanse, on anyone

but you, nor hastened across the earth's open ground,

ولا رفعت كفي على إثر هالك

ردائي على عيني ولا قرعت سنّي

nor, after a death, had my hand ever raised

my cloak over my eyes, nor had I struck my tooth.

بمن أدفع اليوم المريضة شمسه

وليلة غمّي قال همّي لها جنّي

With whom shall I repel the day whose sun is sick,

and my grief's night, to which my sorrow says, 'Darken!'?

ومن أترك الشكوى به غير قانط

فيحمل عني عبأها غير ممتنِّ

Through whom can I leave off complaining, without despair,

and have him shoulder its burden for me, without claiming a favor?

ويعضدني والرأي أعمى مُدَلَّهٌ

ببلجة خطاف البصيرة معتنِّ

And support me, when judgment is blind and bewildered,

with the clear light of one quick of insight and ready to intervene?

سددت مدى طرفي وأوحشت جانبي

من الناس حتى ربت فاستوحشوا مني

You blocked the reach of my gaze and left my side desolate

of people, until I distrusted them and they grew estranged from me.

وكنت يدي بانت وعيني تعذرت

عليَّ وسيفي ترَّ من خللِ الجفنِ

You were my hand, now gone, and my eye, now lost

to me, and my sword, fallen from the gap in its sheath.

فأصبحتُ أرمي في العدا غيرَ صائبٍ

بسهم وأرمَى بالأذى غير مجتنِّ

So now I shoot at enemies without hitting

with my arrow, and am struck by harm without shelter.

وكم أزلقتني وقفة بين حاسدي

وبيني وأعيتني فقلت لك ارشدني

How often a confrontation tripped me, between my envier

and me, and baffled me, so I told you, 'Guide me.'

ومرهِقة أعددت بِرَّك بي لها

فكنت أخي فيها كأنك كنت ابني

And many an ordeal for which I prepared your kindness to me,

you were my brother through it, as though you were my son.

فلا قلت يا نفسي بخلٍّ تأنسي

ويا كبدي حنّي إلى سكنٍ حنِّي

May I never say, 'My soul, find comfort in a friend,'

or, 'My liver, yearn for a comforter—yearn.'

مضى من به بعت الورى غير جاهل

بربحيَ واستوحدته غير مستثني

Gone is he for whom I traded all mankind, knowing full well

my gain, and singled him out, making no exception.

ثويت وأبقيت الجوى ليَ والأسى

فموتك ما يبلي وعيشيَ ما يفني

You have lain down, leaving heartache and grief to me;

your death is what wears me down, and my life what destroys me.

كأني كنزت الذخر منك لفاقتي

بفقدك واستثمرت من غبطتي حزني

As though I had hoarded treasure in you against my need

at your loss, and made my happiness bear sorrow as its fruit.

هَنَا التُّربَ في قُوسانَ أنك نازلٌ

بأدراجه إن بُشِّرَ التُّربُ أو هُنِّي

It gladdens Qusan's dust that you have settled

within its folds—if dust may hear glad tidings or be congratulated.

تطيبُ بك الأرضُ الخبيثُ صعيدُها

ولو فطنتْ أثنت عليك كما أُثني

Through you the earth, though foul in soil, grows sweet;

if it could understand, it would praise you as I do.

وزارك محلولُ الوديعةِ مسبِلٌ

رفيقٌ على فرط الوكيفةِ والهَتْنِ

May a pouring cloud visit you, its stored bounty released,

gentle despite its plentiful dripping and steady rain;

أحمُّ شَماليٌّ كأنَّ غمامَه

سُروبُ ظباءٍ أو ندائفُ من عِهْنِ

dark, borne from the north, as though its clouds

were herds of gazelles or fluffed tufts of dyed wool.

إذا اختلفت أرضٌ خُفوضا ورفعةً

طغَى شامخا فاستبدل السهلَ بالحَزْنِ

When the land varies in hollow and height,

it surges high, exchanging rugged terrain for level ground.

تألَّت لك الأنواءُ أن ليس بعده

عقابيلُ في حوزٍ لهنّ ولا خَزْنِ

The rain-stars swear to you that after it no

further showers remain in their possession or store.

تَصُوبُ وأبكى دائبيْن فإن ونت

ففوِّض إلى دمعي وعوّل على جفني

It pours, and I weep, both unceasing; if it should flag,

then entrust yourself to my tears, and rely on my eyelids.