بت أرعى في الظلام الأنجما — Elia Abu Madi

بِتُّ أَرعى في الظَلامِ الأَنجُما

لَيسَ لِلعُشّاقِ حَظٌّ في الكَرى

I spent the night watching the stars in the darkness.

Lovers have no share in sleep.

صَرَعَتني نَظرَةٌ حَتّى لَقَد

كُدتُ أَن أَحسُدَ مَن لا يُبصَرُ

A glance felled me, so that, indeed,

I nearly envied those who cannot see.

نَظرَةٌ قَد أَورَثَت قَلبي الكَمَد

ما بَلاءُ القَلبِ إِلّا النَظَرُ

A glance has bequeathed grief to my heart;

the heart's affliction is nothing but looking.

لا رَعاكَ اللَهُ يا يَومَ الأَحَدِ

لا وَلا حَيّاكَ عَنّي المَطَرَ

May God not watch over you, O Sunday!

No, nor may rain greet you on my behalf.

أَنتَ مَن أَطلَعتَ هاتيكَ الدُمى

سافِراتٍ فِتنَةً لِلشُعَرا

You are the one who brought out those doll-like beauties,

unveiled, a temptation to poets.

هِمتَ فيمَن حَسُنَت صورَتُها

مِثلَما قَد حَسُنَت مِنها الخِصال

I fell in love with one whose form was lovely,

just as her qualities were lovely.

أَخجَلَت شَمسَ الضُحى طُلعَتُها

وَاِستَحى مِن لَحظِها لَحظُ الغَزال

Her face put the morning sun to shame,

and the gazelle's gaze grew bashful before hers.

كُلُّ ما فيها جَميلٌ يُشتَهى

ما بِها عَيبٌ سِوى فَرطِ الجَمال

Everything in her is beautiful and desirable;

she has no flaw except an excess of beauty.

لَو رَآها لائِمي فيها لَما

لامَني في هُبِّها بَل عَذَرا

Had the one who blames me for her seen her, he would not

have blamed me for loving her, but excused me.

ذاتُ حُسنٍ خَدُّها كَالوَردِ في

لَونِه وَالطيبِ في نَكهَتِهِ

A beauty whose cheek is like the rose in

its color, and like perfume in its fragrance.

زَهرَةٌ لَكِنَّها لَم تُقطَفِ

وَجَمالُ الزَهرِ في رَوضَتَيهِ

A flower, but one never plucked,

and the flower's beauty lies in its two gardens.

دُرَّةٌ ما خَرَجَت مِن صَدَفٍ

تُرخِصُ الدَرَّ عَلى قيمَتِهِ

A pearl that has never emerged from a shell,

she makes pearls cheap despite their worth.

بَضَّةُ الخَدَّين وَالنَهدَينِ ما

سَفَرَت إِلّا رَأَيتُ القَمَرا

Soft of cheeks and breasts—never

did she unveil without my seeing the moon.

ذاتُ شَعرٍ مُسبَلٍ كَالأُفعُوان

يَتهادى فَوقَ رِدفٍ كَالكَئيب

With flowing hair like a great serpent,

swaying over her haunches like one sorrowful.

وَقَوامٌ لَو رَآهُ الغُصنُ بان

خَجِلاً مِن ذَلِكَ الغُصنِ الرَطيب

And a figure—if a branch saw it, it would withdraw,

ashamed before that tender bough.

كادَ لَولا مابِهِ مِن عُنفُوان

يَقِفُ الوِرقُ بِه وَالعَندَليب

But for its youthful vigor, it would almost

have doves and the nightingale perch upon it.

وَجُفونٌ أَشبَهَتني سَقَماً

كَمَنَ السِحرُ بِها وَاِستَتَرا

And eyelids that resembled me in languor:

magic lurked in them and hid itself.

تَبعَثُ الحُبَّ إِلى قَلبِ الخَلي

وَهوَ لا يَدري وَلا يَستَشعِرُ

They send love into a carefree person's heart,

while he neither knows nor senses it.

وَالهَوى في بَدَنِهِ عَذبٌ شَهِيُّ

كُلُّ شَيءٍ بَعدَهُ مُحتَقَرُ

And passion in his body is sweet and delicious;

everything thereafter is despised.

كُلُّ مَن لا يَعرِفُ الحُبَّ شَقِيُّ

لا يَرى في دَهرِهِ ما يُشكَرُ

Whoever does not know love is wretched;

he sees nothing in his lifetime to be thankful for.

يَصرُفُ العُمر وَلَكِن سَأَماً

عَبَثاً يَطلُبُ أَن لا يَضجُرا

He spends his life, yet only in boredom;

in vain he seeks not to grow weary.

لَم أَكُن أَعرِفُ ما مَعنى الهَنا

قَبَ أَن أَعرِفَ ما مَعنى الغَرام

I did not know what happiness meant

before I knew what love meant.

يَضحَكُ الناسُ سُرورا وَأَنا

عابِسٌ حَتّى كَأَنّي في خِصام

People laughed for joy, while I

scowled, as though in a quarrel.

عَجَبوا مِنّي وَقالوا عَلَناً

قَد رَأَينا الصَخرَ في زَيِّ الأَنام

They marveled at me and said aloud,

'We have seen stone in human guise.'

أَوشَكوا أَن يَحسِبوني صَنَماً

لَو رَأَوا الأَصنامَ تَخفي كَدَرا

They nearly took me for an idol,

had they seen idols conceal sorrow.

لَم أَزَل في رَبقَةِ اليَأسِ إِلى

أَن أَعادَ الحُبُّ لي بَعضَ الرَجا

I remained in the noose of despair until

love restored to me a little hope.

كُنتُ قَبلَ الحُبِّ أَسري في ظَلامٍ

وَلا أَلقى لِنَفسِيَ مَخرَجا

Before love, I journeyed by night through darkness,

and found no way out for myself.

فَجَلاهُ الحُبُّ عَنّي فَاِنجَلى

مِثلَما يَجلو سَنا الشَمسُ الدُجى

Then love cleared it from me, and it lifted,

as the sun's radiance clears away the darkness.

باتَ قَلبِيَ بِالأَماني مُفعَما

وَهوَ قَبلاً كانَ مِنها مَقفَرا

My heart became brimful of wishes,

though before it had been barren of them.

رَوَّعَتني بِالنَوى بَعدَ اللِقاء

وَكَذا الدُنيا دُنُو وَاِفتِراق

She terrified me with separation after our meeting;

and so is life: closeness and parting.

غَضِبَ الدَهرُ عَلى كَأسِ الصَفاء

مُذ رَآها فَأَبى أَلّا تُراق

Time grew angry at the cup of serenity

the moment it saw it, and insisted it be spilled.

وَلَو أَنَّ الدَهرَ يَدري بِالشَقاء

ساعَدَ الصَبَّ عَلى نَيلِ التَلاق

And had Time known suffering,

it would have helped the lovesick one attain reunion.

لَم أَجِد لي مُشبِهاً تَحتَ السَما

في شَقائي لا وَلا فَوقَ الثَرى

I found no one like me beneath the sky

in my misery—no, nor upon the earth.

وَأَبي لَو أَنَّ ما بي بِالجِبال

أَصبَحَت تَهتَزُّ مِن مُرِّ النَسيم

By my father, had what afflicts me afflicted the mountains,

they would have trembled at the passing of the breeze.

فَاِعذُروني إِن أَكُن مِثلَ الخَيال

وَاِعذُلوني إِن أَكُن غَيرَ سَقيم

So pardon me if I am like a phantom,

and blame me if I am not sick.

إِنَّ دائِيَ جاءَ مِن صاد وَدال

وَدَواءُ القَلبِ في ضاد وَميم

My illness came from ṣād and dāl,

and the heart's cure lies in ḍād and mīm.

باتَ صَبِيَ مِثلُ جِسمي عَدَما

إِنَّما يَصبُرُ مَن قَد قَدِرا

My patience, like my body, came to nothing;

only one who has the strength can endure.

رُبَّ لَيلٍ عادَني فيهِ السُهاد

وَنَأى عَن مُقلَتي طيبُ الكَرى

Many a night sleeplessness visited me,

and sweet slumber withdrew from my eye.

هاجَتِ الذِكرى شُجوناً في الفُؤاد

فَبَكى طَرفي عَقيقاً أَحمَرا

Memory stirred sorrows in my heart,

so my eye wept red agate.

نَبَّهَ الأَهلَ بُكائِي وَالعِباد

فَأَتوا يَستَطلِعونَ الخَبَرا

My weeping roused my household and the people,

so they came to find out what had happened.

قُلتُ داءٌ في الفُؤادِ اِستَحكَما

كادَ قَلبِيَ مِنهُ أَن يَنفَطِرا

I said, 'An illness has taken firm hold in my heart;

my heart has nearly split apart from it.'

صَدَّقوا ما قُلتُهُ ثُمَّ مَضى

واحِدٌ مِنهُم يَستَدعي الطَبيب

They believed what I said; then off went

one of them to summon the doctor.

سار وَالكُلُّ عَلى جَمرِ الغَضا

وَأَنا بَينَ أَنين وَنَحيب

He went, with everyone on embers of ghada wood,

while I was between moaning and sobbing.

لَم يَكُن إِلّا كَبَرقٍ وَمَضا

وَإِذا الدُكتورُ مِن مَهدي قَريب

It was but like lightning that flashed,

and suddenly the doctor was near my bed.

قالَ لِلجُمهورِ ماذا الاِجتِماع

أُخرُجوا أَو زِدتُموهُ خَطَرا

He said to the crowd, 'Why this gathering?

Leave, or you will put him in greater danger.'

خَرَجَ الكُلُّ فَأَمسَت غُرفَتي

مِثلُ قَلبِ الطِفلِ أَو جَيبِ الأَديب

Everyone left, and my room became

like a child's heart or a writer's pocket.

فَدَنا يَسأَلُني عَن عِلَّتي

وَأَنا أَسمَعُ لَكِن لا أُجيب

Then he drew near, asking me about my illness,

while I listened but did not answer.

فَنَضا الثَوبَ فَأَبصَرتُ الَّتي

كادَ جِسمِيَ في هَواها أَن يَغيب

He slipped off the robe, and I beheld the woman

for love of whom my body had nearly vanished.

خَلَعَت عَنها لِباسَ الحُكَما

فَرَأَت عَينايَ بَدراً نَيِّرا

She took off the physicians' garb,

and my eyes saw a radiant full moon.

وَاِعتَرَتني دَهشَةٌ لَكِنَّها

دَهشَةٌ مَمزوجَةٌ بِالفَرَحِ

Astonishment seized me, but it was

astonishment mingled with joy.

كدتُ أَن أَخرُجَ عَن طَورِ النُهى

رُبَّ سُكرٍ لَم يَكُن مِن قَدَحِ

I nearly passed beyond the bounds of reason;

many an intoxication does not come from a cup.

يا لَها مِن ساعَةٍ لَو أَنَّها

بَقِيَت كَالدَهرِ لَم تُستَقبَحِ

Oh, what an hour! Had it

lasted as long as Time, it would not have seemed unwelcome.

عانَقَتني وَأَنا أَبكي دَماً

وَهيَ تَبكي لِبُكائِيَ دُرَرا

She embraced me while I wept blood,

while she wept pearls at my weeping.

وَجَعَلنا بَعدَ أَن طالَ العِناق

تَتَناجى بِأَحاديثِ القُلوب

And after the embrace had lasted long, we began

to whisper to each other the confidences of hearts.

بَينَما نَحنُ عَلى هَذا الوِفاق

قُرِعَ البابُ فَأَوشَكنا نَذوب

While we were in this harmony,

the door was knocked on, and we nearly melted away.

فَأَشارَت لِيَ قَد حانَ الفُراق

فَاِنقَطَعنا وَاِرتَدَت ثَوبَ الطَبيب

She signaled to me: 'The time to part has come.'

So we broke off, and she donned the doctor's robe.

أَقبَلَ القَومُ فَقالَت كُلُّ ما

كانَ يَشكو مِنهُ عَنهُ قَد سَرى

The people came in, and she said, 'All that

he had complained of has left him.'