إيه على تذكار ما سلفا — Dhafer Al Haddad

إيهٍ على تذكارِ ما سَلَفا

فالدمعُ منك أَقلُّ ما وَكَفا

Go on, recalling what has passed;

for yours are the scantest tears ever shed.

يا عين أنت جلبتِ ناظرةً

لفؤاديَ الأشواقَ والشَّغَفا

O eye, it was you, while gazing, who brought

longing and ardent passion to my heart.

كم قد كَففتُك خائفاً حَذِرا

عن ناظرٍ يَقْوَى إذا ضَعُفا

How often I held you back, fearful and wary,

from an eye that grows strong as it languishes!

فعَجِبتُ كيف رَمَيْتِ يومئذٍ

سهما فعادَ لوقِته هدفا

I marveled how, that day, you shot

an arrow that at once became a target.

ذاك التبسُّمُ كان غايتَه

هذا البكاء لأجله سَرَفا

That smile had as its outcome

this extravagant weeping for its sake.

أَسرتْك وانصرفَتْ وما وَجَدت

عَزَماتُ قلِبك بعدُ مُنْصَرَفا

She captured you and departed, yet

your heart's resolves have since found no escape.

واللهِ ربِّ مِنىً وما جَمعتْ

وكفى بذاك لمُقْسِمٍ حَلَفا

By God, Lord of Mina and all it gathers—

and that is oath enough for one who swears—

إنى إذا ما الوصلُ أَمْكَنني

نَزَّهتُه عن ريبةٍ أَنَفا

indeed, whenever union is within my reach,

I keep it free of suspicion, out of self-respect.

وأبيت أَقَنع بالحديثِ ولو

كان الحديثُ إشارةً لكَفَى

And I pass the night content with talk; even if

that talk were a gesture, it would suffice;

وبما يُبَلِّغه الرسولُ ولو

كان النسيمُ رسولَها لشَفَي

and with whatever the messenger conveys; even if

the breeze were her messenger, it would heal me;

وبطيفِها وبأنها علمتْ

أنى أَبيت بحبها كلِفا

and with her phantom, and with her knowing

that I pass the night enthralled by love for her;

وبلفظِ مَبْسِمِها ومَقْصِدُه

أخرى فيُهْجُني وما عَرَفا

and with a word from her smiling mouth, though meant

for another woman: it stirs me, though it knows me not;

وبرَشْفِ ماءِ النيلِ قد وَردَتْ

أولاَه ثم وردتُه طَرَفا

and with sipping Nile water: she had reached

its upper waters, then I came to its far end.

ولوِ استطعتُ منعتُ إذ وَردَتْ

منْ عَبَّ من شَطَّيْه أو رَشَفا

Had I been able, when she came to drink, I would have barred

anyone who gulped or sipped from either bank,

غَيْران من علمي بأنّ به

من سُؤْرِ شهدِ رُضابِها نُطَفا

jealous, knowing that within it

were drops left from the honey of her saliva.

وأَغارُ من مرِّ النسيم بها

دوني يُباشِر ذلك التَّرفا

And I envy the breeze that passes over her,

touching that softness to my exclusion.

مالي وللعُذال لا سَعِدوا

فلقد لقيتُ بعَذْلهم جَنَفا

What have I to do with the censurers—may they never prosper!

For their reproaches have indeed wronged me.

عَذَلوا وما عَشِقوا ولو عشقوا

قَبِلوا هنالك عُذْرَ من شُغِفا

They blamed without loving; had they loved,

they would then have accepted the excuse of one consumed by love.

يا وَيْحهَم لو أبصروا رَشَأً

يهتزُّ من لينِ الصِّبا هَيَفا

Ah, poor wretches! Had they seen a young gazelle,

slim-waisted, swaying with youth's suppleness—

بدرٌ على غصنٍ على نَقَوَىْ

رملٍ أَضاءَ وماسَ وارْتَدَفا

a full moon upon a bough upon twin dunes

of sand—radiant, swaying, full-hipped;

يفتر عن نَوْر الأَقاحِ إذا

وافَى نَدىً سَحَرا به فصفا

whose smile reveals chamomile blossoms when

dew visits them before dawn and they shine clear;

كالدُّرِّ لكنْ صاغ ناظمُه

بالمسكِ من لَعَسٍ به صَدَفا

like pearls, but their stringer fashioned

a shell of musk from the dusky tint around them;

وجَنِىُّ وردٍ فوقَ وجْنِته

يَحمرُّ ثم يعود إنْ قُطِفا

and fresh roses upon the cheek

redden, then return whenever plucked—

لاستبدلوا بمَلامتي حسدي

ورأوا تَعاقُل عاذلي خَرَفا

they would exchange their censure of me for envy,

and deem my censurer's affected wisdom dotage.

مَنْ لي بعيشٍ كان لي ومضى

عني ولم أَعتضْ به خَلَفا

Who can restore the life I had, now gone

from me, for which I have found no replacement?

حيث الصبابةُ والصِّبا شَرَعٌ

كلٌّ حَلا وصَفا لمن وَصَفا

Where passionate love and youth were equals,

each sweet and pure to whoever described it.

فكأن عيشي كان بينهما

قبل التفرق روضة أُنُفا

It was as though my life between the two,

before the parting, were an untouched meadow.

إنْ كانت الإسكندريةُ قد

شَطَّتْ فَأَوْلَتنْي نَوًى قَذَفا

Though Alexandria has

grown distant and dealt me far-flung separation,

وسكنتُ بالفُسْطاط مُغْترِبا

فلقد كسبتُ بغربتي شرفا

and I have settled as a stranger in Fustat,

I have indeed gained honor through my life away from home.

ورَقيتُ من مدح الملوك بها

رُتَبا أَنافتْ في العُلى كَنَفا

And there, through praising kings, I climbed

to ranks whose reach towered in glory.

وكسبتُ مالا لو يُرَفِّره

جَدْواىَ لم أعرفْ له طرفا

And I gained wealth—had it been spared

by my generosity, I would have known no end to it.

لكنْ ينازِعني إلى وطني

شوقٌ إذا استمهَلتُه عَسَفا

But toward my homeland I am pulled

by longing that turns cruel when I ask it for respite.

وأَعافُ مِصرَ وعيشُها رَغَد

ويَشوقُني وطني ولو عَجِفَا

I shun Misr, though life there is plentiful,

yet my homeland draws me, even if it grows lean.

أُقْصِي البنفسجَ ثم يُعجبني

أنْ أَنْشَقَ الظَّيّان والطَّرفا

I set violets aside, and yet delight

in breathing clematis and tamarisk,

شوقاً إلى ذاك الثَّرَى وإلى

ذاك النسيمِ الرَّطْبِ حين هَفا

longing for that soil, and for

that moist breeze as it gently blew,

وإلى رياضٍ كان يوقِظني

فيها ندى سَحَرٍ إذا كَثُفا

and for gardens where I would be awakened

by the dew before dawn, when it grew heavy;

وشَميمِ عَرْفِ الروضِ حينَ بدا

ورَخيمِ لَحْنِ الطير إذ هَتفا

and the waft of the garden's perfume as it rose,

and the mellow melody of birds when they sang.

ويهزني مرحُ الشبابِ بها

هزَّ القَضيب اللَّدْن مُنعطِفا

And youthful merriment there would sway me

as a supple bough is swayed and bent,

ما بين أترابٍ قدِ اتفقوا

أنْ يجعلوا ساعاتِهم تُحفَا

among companions of my age who had agreed

to turn their hours into treasures.

يُبدون من آدابِهم مُلَحا

جَعلوا لها آذانَهم صُحُفا

They offered witticisms from their learning,

making their ears pages to receive them.

لَهْفِى على زمنٍ بها وبهم

لو كان ينفعُ قولُ والَهَفا

Alas for those days there, in their company—

if only crying 'Alas!' could do any good!

فارقتُهم وصَحِبتُ بعدهمُ

حاليْن قَرْعَ السِّنِّ والأَسفا

I left them, and afterward took as companions

two states: gnashing my teeth and grief.