ولقد خلوت بعبرة متفردا — Alkadhi Alfadil

وَلَقَد خَلَوتُ بِعَبرَةٍ مُتَفَرِّداً

وَخَلَت بِقَلبي عِندَها أَحزاني

And indeed I withdrew with a tear, alone,

And then my sorrows were alone with my heart.

وَعَرَفتُ مِن بَينِ القُبورِ مَكانَهُ

مِثلَ الهُمومِ وَقَد عَرَفنَ مَكاني

And among the graves I recognized his place,

As cares had already recognized mine.

حُزنٌ غَدَت أَعمارُهُ نوحِيَّةٌ

وَالدَمعُ كَالطَوقانِ لا الغُدرانِ

A sorrow whose lifetimes have become like Noah's,

And tears like the deluge, not pools.

وَأَنا اِبنُ نوحٍ قَبرُهُ الجَبَلُ الَّذي

ما كانَ عاصِمَهُ مِنَ الطوفانِ

And I am Noah's son, whose grave is the mountain that

Did not protect him from the deluge.

أَتُراكَ في دارِ البَقا اِستَبطَأتَني

فَاِنظُر كَأَنَّكَ بي فَسَوفَ تَراني

Have you, in eternity's abode, thought me slow to come?

Then look—you can almost see me, for soon you will see me.

هَذي الحَياةُ أَماتَني دَهري بِها

فضوَدِدتُ لَو بِإِماتَتي أَحياني

Through this life, my fate has put me to death,

So I wished it would revive me by putting me to death.

وَيَقولُ قَلبي فيكَ كُلَّ قَصيدَةٍ

لِلحُزنِ تُخرِسُ ما يَقولُ لِساني

And my heart utters about you every poem

Of grief that silences what my tongue says.

وَإِذا اِستَغاثَ القَلبُ فيكَ بِمُفصِحٍ

لَبَّتهُ تَلبِيَةَ الصَدى أَجفاني

And when the heart cries for an eloquent voice to speak of you,

My eyelids answer it as an echo answers.

بَخِلَ اللِسانُ بِلَفظَةٍ وَبِخاطِري

ما شاءَتِ الأَسماعُ فيكَ مَعانِ

The tongue withholds a word, while in my mind

Are meanings about you, as many as ears could wish.

يا دَهرَ لَونٍ في الإِساءَةِ واحِدٍ

أَينَ التَلَوُّنُ يا أَبا الأَلوانِ

O Time, of a single color in mistreatment,

Where is your changing hue, O father of colors?

عَزّى المُعَزّي غَيرَهُ عَن غَيرِهِ

وَسَلا وَأَخفى سَلوَةَ الغَيرانِ

The comforter consoled another over someone else's loss,

And found solace, hiding it as a jealous man would.

فَاِقصِد فَقَد وَضَعَ الطَريقُ لِقاصِدٍ

بِعَزائِكَ الأَرواحَ في الأَبدانِ

So be moderate: the road has worn down, for one coming

With solace for you, the souls within their bodies.

أَمسَوا سُطوراً في الثَرى مَطوِيَّةً

وَقُبورُهُم مِن فَوقُ كَالعُنوانِ

They became lines folded away in the earth,

And their graves above are like a heading.

أَخجَلتُمُ ثِقَتي وَلَو كُنتُم عِدىً

ما أُخجِلَت لَكِنَّكُم إِخواني

You shamed my trust; had you been enemies,

It would not have been shamed—but you are my brothers.

عَرَفَ الَّذي عَرَفَ الزَمانَ وَأَهلَهُ

وَهُما إِذا ما حُصِّلا زَمَنانِ

He knows, who has known Time and its people,

And, when assessed, the two are two Times.

فَبَقيتُ مَفقوداً بِغَيرِ مُصاحِبٍ

وَيَظَلُّ مَوجوداً بِغَيرِ زَمانِ

So I remained lost, without a companion,

And he remains present, without Time.

لي مِنهُ طَيفٌ لَو هَجَعتُ وَذِكرُهُ

مِنهُ عَلى اليَقَظاتِ طَيفٌ ثانِ

I would have a phantom of him, were I to sleep; and his memory

Is a second phantom of him throughout my waking hours.

لَم أَنسَ عَهدَكُمُ عَلى بُعدِ المَدى

وَيُقَلِّلُ النِسيانُ بِالإِنسانِ

I have not forgotten my bond with you, despite the distance,

And forgetfulness diminishes a human being.

وَتَقولُ عَيني كَيفَ أَنسى ذِكرَ مَن

ما زالَ أَسكَنَ فِيَّ مِن إِنساني

And my eye says, 'How can I forget the memory of one

Who remains more firmly lodged in me than my own pupil?'

أَنتَ الطَليقُ مِنَ الحَياةِ وَها أَنا

في سِجنِها أَمسَيتُ عَينَ العاني

You are freed from life; and here I am,

In its prison, having become a captive through and through.

أَهلُ المَصائِبِ بَعدَكُم أَهلي كَما

أَنَّ القُبورَ لِأَجلِكُم أَوطاني

After you, those afflicted are my kin, just as

The graves, for your sake, are my homelands.

ما عادَ دَهري مَرَّةً بِإِساءَةٍ

وَمَتى بَداني قَطُّ بِالإِحسانِ

My fate never once returned with harm—

And when did it ever begin with kindness toward me?

كُنتُم حِجاباً حالَ فيما بَينَنا

وَعَدِمتُكُم فَرَأَيتُهُ وَرَآني

You were a veil that stood between us,

And I lost you; then I saw it, and it saw me.

وَلَقيتُ ما لَم يَكفِهِ صَبري وَلَم

يَثبُت لِرَوعَةِ ما جَناهُ جَناني

And I met what my patience could not bear, nor

Did my heart stand firm before the terror of what it inflicted.

أَخَوَيٍّ لَم يَعرِف ضَنايَ سِواكُما

ما أَنتُم أَخَوانِ بَل أَبَوانِ

My two brothers, none but you two knew my anguish;

You are not two brothers, but two fathers.

وَوَقَفتُ في يَومَيكُما أَفَلا عَلى

يَومِ ذَخِرتُكُما لَهُ تَقِفانِ

And I stood on your two days; will you not

Stand on the day for which I had kept you in reserve?

أَنكَرتُ بَعدَكُما الوُجوهُ فَكُلُّ مَن

قَد كانَ ذا وَجهٍ لَهُ وَجهانِ

I found faces strange after you two; for everyone who

Once had one face now has two.

فَكَأَنَّ باسِمَها الَّذي يَشكو إِلى

قَلبي وَمُقبِلَها الَّذي وَلّاني

So their smiling face seems the one that complains to

My heart, and their welcoming face the one that turned away from me.

وَسَمِعتُ ما قالَ المُسَلّي وَهوَ لي

يُغري وَقامَ بِزَعمِهِ يَنهاني

And I heard what the comforter said, while he was

Inciting me, though he claimed to set out to restrain me.

عَينُ الكَثيبِ وَسَمعُهُ في قَلبِهِ

لا ما اِدَّعَت عَيناهُ وَالأُذُنانِ

The sorrowful one's eye and hearing are in his heart,

Not what his two eyes and two ears claim.

وَإِلَيكَ عَنهُ يا عَذولُ فَرُبَّما

يُغشي الزَفيرُ لِنارِهِ بِدُخانِ

And keep away from him, O reprover, for sometimes

Sighing envelops you in smoke from its fire.

لَم أَنسَ فَالَكَ وَالبَلاءُ مُوَكَّلٌ

بِالنُطقِ قِدماً أَو فَبِالإِنسانِ

I have not forgotten your omen; calamity is bound

To speech from of old—or else to humankind.

إِذ قُلتُ هاتيكَ النِيابُ ذَخِرتَها

خِلَعَ الطَبيبِ فَقُلتُ أَو أَكفاني

When I said, 'Those garments—you have saved them

As robes of honor for the physician,' I said, 'Or my shrouds.'

وَالدَمعُ في أَجفانِهِ مُتَرَقرِقٌ

وَيَرِقُّ لي مِن ذِكرِهِ الجَفنانِ

And tears shimmered in his eyelids,

And at his remembrance my two eyelids grow tender.

وَرَأَيتُ مِنهُ ما رَأى في نَفسِهِ

عِندَ النَوى فَبَكَيتُهُ وَبَكاني

And I saw in him what he saw in himself

At parting; then I wept for him, and he wept for me.