لا عرتك الخطوبُ يا ابنَ حريثٍ

لا عرتك الخطوبُ يا ابنَ حريثٍ

لا ولا نالكَ الفناءُ الوشيكُ

لا ولا نالكَ الفناءُ الوشيكُ

May misfortunes never befall you, Ibn Hurayth.

The misfortunes did not afflict you, O son of Harith,

No, nor may imminent death overtake you.

Nor did imminent death befall you.

فلعمري ما حاتمٌ بمُدانٍ

فلعمري ما حاتمٌ بمُدانٍ

لك لولا الشَّنارُ والتهتيكُ

لك لولا الشَّنارُ والتهتيكُ

For, by my life, Hatim would be no match

By my life, Hatim is not with blames,

For you, were it not for infamy and scandalous exposure.

Were it not for defamation and insult.

أنت شيخٌ عطاؤه حيوانٌ

أنت شيخٌ عطاؤه حيوانٌ

إذ عطاياهُمُ الجمادُ السبيكُ

إذ عطاياهُمُ الجمادُ السبيكُ

You are an old man whose gifts are living beings,

You are an old man whose generosity is animalistic,

Whereas their gifts are lifeless, cast metal.

Since their gifts are inanimate cast iron.

يا ضعيفاً في رأسه ألفُ قرنٍ

يا ضعيفاً في رأسه ألفُ قرنٍ

عدداً كلُّها غليظٌ سميك

عدداً كلُّها غليظٌ سميك

O weakling, with a thousand horns upon his head,

O weak-minded one with a thousand horns on his head,

In number, each one thick and stout.

All of which are thick and bulky.

يا فتى حينَ يلبسُ الكشخَ غرَّ

يا فتى حينَ يلبسُ الكشخَ غرَّ

وبه دون فلْسِهِ تحنيك

وبه دون فلْسِهِ تحنيك

O youth, naïve when donning cuckoldry,

O lad, when he wears fancy clothes

And his worldly wisdom is worth less than his penny.

While he is penniless underneath.

لم تزل نسوةٌ لديه قِراهُ

لم تزل نسوةٌ لديه قِراهُ

منذ ناغَى ثُديَّها التفليك

منذ ناغَى ثُديَّها التفليك

Women have always been his guests' fare,

There have been women in his lap

Since roundness cooed to their breasts.

Since his breasts swelled during puberty.

ليمَ في أختِه فقال مجيباً

ليمَ في أختِه فقال مجيباً

تِلك نعلٌ وحقُّها التشريك

تِلك نعلٌ وحقُّها التشريك

Reproached over his sister, he answered:

He lusted for his sister, and replied, saying:

“She is a sandal: her due is strapping—and sharing.”

"She is just a slipper, and polytheism is its right."

منحَ اللَّه جدَّةَ الشُّركِ الشي

منحَ اللَّه جدَّةَ الشُّركِ الشي

خَ ولا انفكَّ ذلك التفكيك

خَ ولا انفكَّ ذلك التفكيك

May God grant fresh sandal-straps to the old

God granted the Sheikh the polytheism of polytheism,

man, and may that unfastening never cease.

And that creed remained unchallenged.

هكذا يفضحُ الرجالُ لعمري

هكذا يفضحُ الرجالُ لعمري

وكذا يحلمُ السفيهُ الركيك

وكذا يحلمُ السفيهُ الركيك

Thus men are disgraced, by my life,

This is how men expose themselves, by my life,

And thus the feeble fool shows forbearance.

And this is how the vile fool dreams.

ولقد لامها فأربت عليه

ولقد لامها فأربت عليه

ورُقاهُ في مثلها لا تُحيك

ورُقاهُ في مثلها لا تُحيك

And he did reproach her, but she outdid him,

She blamed him, but he justified himself,

And his incantations have no effect on one like her.

And excused him in the like of her, something unimaginable.

قال ما لي متى حَبِلتِ فقالت

قال ما لي متى حَبِلتِ فقالت

لك لطمٌ أخفُّهُ التتريك

لك لطمٌ أخفُّهُ التتريك

He said, “What do I get when you conceive?” She replied:

She asked, "Why did you impregnate me?" He replied:

“Slaps for you, the mildest a Turkish-style blow.”

"You deserve a slap, lighter than a flick."

تلك أختٌ فمَنْ بلاكَ بعرسٍ

تلك أختٌ فمَنْ بلاكَ بعرسٍ

قل لنا أيها السمين الوديك

قل لنا أيها السمين الوديك

That is a sister—so who afflicted you with a wife?

"She is a sister, so who enticed you to the wedding?"

Tell us, you fat, greasy fellow.

Tell us, O fat and plump rooster.

بع بُناناً فأنت عنها غنيٌّ

بع بُناناً فأنت عنها غنيٌّ

إنما يقتني الدجاجة ديك

إنما يقتني الدجاجة ديك

Sell Bunan: you have no need of her.

Sell your hens, for you have no need of them,

Only a cock keeps a hen.

Only a rooster acquires hens.

لا وجُردانِكَ المُطلِّ عليه

لا وجُردانِكَ المُطلِّ عليه

ذلك البطنُ لا استطعتَ تنيك

ذلك البطنُ لا استطعتَ تنيك

No! By your prick, over which

Take off your pants which expose

That belly looms—may you never manage to fuck.

That belly of yours, you cannot copulate."

ومحالٌ قبول عِرسكَ منك ال

ومحالٌ قبول عِرسكَ منك ال

خسف ما لم يَشْركك فيها شريك

خسف ما لم يَشْركك فيها شريك

And your wife cannot accept from you the

It is impossible for her to accept your marriage proposal

humiliation, unless a partner shares her with you.

Unless someone shares her with you.

مَلكَتها الفحولُ دونك يا شي

مَلكَتها الفحولُ دونك يا شي

خُ جهاراً ولم يقع تمليك

خُ جهاراً ولم يقع تمليك

The studs have possessed her instead of you, O old

The studs have owned her, not you O Sheikh,

man, openly, with no transfer of ownership.

Forcefully, without any formal transfer of ownership.

ليُبرِّد حشاكَ أن شواها

ليُبرِّد حشاكَ أن شواها

فوق أعناقهم وأنت المليك

فوق أعناقهم وأنت المليك

Let this cool your innards: her limbs

To cool down your arousal, that they

Are above their necks, while you are the king.

Carried her above their necks while you are the king.

وليسكِّنْ جواك إذ حلقَتْهُ

وليسكِّنْ جواك إذ حلقَتْهُ

أنْ سيدمي خُصاهُمُ التشويك

أنْ سيدمي خُصاهُمُ التشويك

And let this soothe your anguish, since she shaved it:

And to soothe your fervor when they

The prickly stubble will make their testicles bleed.

Castrated them, by plucking their testicles.

قد صدقناك عن بُنانك يا شي

قد صدقناك عن بُنانك يا شي

خُ فلا يستفزَّك التشكيك

خُ فلا يستفزَّك التشكيك

We have told you the truth about your Bunan, O old

We believed you about your hens, O Sheikh,

man; so do not let doubt unsettle you.

So as not to provoke your doubt.

كلَّ يومٍ لها بغيرك عُرسٌ

كلَّ يومٍ لها بغيرك عُرسٌ

لك منه الدعاء والتبريك

لك منه الدعاء والتبريك

Every day she has a wedding with someone other than you;

Every day she has a wedding with someone other than you,

Your share of it is prayers and blessings.

You get from it blessings and congratulations.

ولماذا تردُّها عن هواها

ولماذا تردُّها عن هواها

جثةٌ فَدْمةٌ وعقلٌ نهيك

جثةٌ فَدْمةٌ وعقلٌ نهيك

And why would you turn her from her desire—

Why do you want her to abstain from her desires,

A sluggish body and an enfeebled mind,

A lifeless, apathetic, foolish mind?

وقرونٌ يسير في سَمكها القم

وقرونٌ يسير في سَمكها القم

لُ حِثاثاً والسير حَوْلٌ دكيك

لُ حِثاثاً والسير حَوْلٌ دكيك

And horns in whose height the lice travel

And horns that walk in their thickness

Swiftly, the journey taking a whole year?

Clumsily, with a heavy gait.

هي في شأنها وأنت فريدٌ

هي في شأنها وأنت فريدٌ

في هوانٍ ضجيعك التدليكُ

في هوانٍ ضجيعك التدليكُ

She goes about her business, while you are alone,

She is busy with her own affairs, while you are

In humiliation, with self-rubbing for your bedfellow.

Unique in your disgrace, your massage is kneading.

يا ثقيلَ القرونِ يا جبلَ العا

يا ثقيلَ القرونِ يا جبلَ العا

رِ أما يستفزك التحريكُ

رِ أما يستفزك التحريكُ

O heavy-horned one, O mountain of shame,

O heavy-horned, O mountainous bald man,

Does shaking not rouse you?

Does this movement not provoke you?