لم يبق لي صبر ولا كتمان — Khalil Khoury

لَم يَبقَ لي صَبرٌ وَلا كِتمانٌ

كَلا وَلا دينٌ وَلا إِيمانُ

Neither patience nor concealment remains to me.

No—nor religion, nor faith.

اِستَغفر اللَهَ العَظيم بذلتي

قَد ضِقتُ ذِرعاً فَاِستَطالَ لِسانُ

I seek forgiveness from God Almighty in my abasement.

I can bear no more, and my tongue has grown insolent.

أَنا قَد جَننتُ فَما اِحتِيالي بِالقَضا

لا بُغيَةً تَقضى وَلا سُلوانُ

I have gone mad; what recourse have I against fate?

No desire is fulfilled, nor is there any solace.

كُفي حِرابَكِ وَاِرفِقي بِحشاشَتي

ما لي اِحتِمالٌ إِنَّني إِنسانُ

Hold back your spears, and be gentle with my last spark of life.

I have no strength to endure; I am human.

ما زالَ في قَلبي يُنبهُ مضرما

نار الصَبابة طَرفكِ النَعسانُ

Still in my heart it stirs, kindling

the fire of longing—your drowsy gaze.

وَقِوامك الفَتاك يَسلب مُهجَتي

وَيَضيعُ عَقلي وَجهَكَ الفَتانُ

And your deadly figure steals my very soul,

and your enchanting face makes me lose my reason.

تَمضي السِنينُ وَلي عَذابٌ ثابِتٌ

بِازاءِ وَجهي وَالأَذى أَلوانُ

The years pass, but my torment stays fixed

before my face, and suffering comes in many colors.

ها كُلُ أَمرٍ في البَرية يَنقَضي

لَكن لامري لَيسَ يُصلِحُ شانُ

See, every matter in creation comes to an end,

but my own condition does not improve.

قَد أَصلَحَ الشام البَهيج بِنعمَةٍ

بَعدَ المَصائِبِ وَازِدَهى لُبنانُ

Fair al-Sham has been restored through grace,

after calamities, and Lebanon has grown splendid.

وَأَنا لِسَخطِكِ في مَصابٍ دائشمٍ

زادَت بِهِ الأَكدار وَالأَشجانُ

Yet your displeasure keeps me in perpetual affliction,

through which troubles and sorrows have increased.

وَالنيلُ أَحيى أَرضَ مَصرَ بِجودِهِ

فَاِمتَدَّ فَوقَ مُروجِها الفَيضانُ

And the Nile has revived Egypt's land with its bounty,

so the flood spread over its meadows.

وَوَفا الوَفاء لِكُل ظام ساكِباً

كاسَ الصَفا وَأَنا أَنا الظَمأنُ

And faithfulness has kept faith with every thirsty soul, pouring

a cup of serenity—while I, I am the thirsty one.

وَفوارس الجَبل الأَصَم الأَسود العاصي

لَقَد تَرَكوا الحُروب وَدانوا

And the horsemen of the unyielding, black, rebellious mountain

have indeed abandoned war and submitted.

تَرَكوا العِناد مَع الفَساد وَأَذعَنوا

وَعِناد فكرك ما لَهُ إِذعانُ

They abandoned obstinacy and corruption, and yielded,

yet your mind's obstinacy knows no submission.

وَبِتونس الخَضراء قَد خَمد اللَظا

بَعدَ العَواصف وَاِنمَحى العِصيانُ

And in green Tunis the blaze has died down,

after the storms, and rebellion has been erased.

وَعَواصف الحُب المُريعة في حَشى

هَذا الخَليل يَثيرُها الهُجرانُ

And love's dreadful storms within the breast

of this Khalil are stirred by abandonment.

وَالشَركَس الأَبطال بَعدَ خُروجِهُم

قَد هاجَروا فَحماهُم السُلطانُ

And the valiant Circassians, after their departure,

have emigrated, and the sultan sheltered them.

وَجَدوا لَهُم وَطَناً بِواسع مُلكِهِ

وَغَدا يَفيض عَلَيهُم الإِحسانُ

They found a homeland in his vast dominion,

and benevolence began to pour upon them.

لَكنَّ بثخلَكَ لا يَزالُ مُعَذِبي

مَن رامَ جودَكَ ضَرَهُ الحِرمانُ

Yet your miserliness never ceases to torment me;

whoever seeks your bounty is harmed by deprivation.

فَأَنا لِهَجرِكَ في شَتاتٍ دايِمٍ

مَنفىً وَما لي في البِلاد مَكانُ

So your desertion leaves me in perpetual displacement,

exiled, with no place for me in these lands.

ما لي سِوى الدُنيا الجَديدة مشبهٌ

بِدَوام حَربك ما جَرى الدَوَران

I have no counterpart but the New World,

with your war enduring as long as time revolves.

أَفنوا الحَديد عَلى الجُسوم فَبَعدُهُ

أَي الجُسوم لَدى الحُروب تُصانُ

They used up their iron upon bodies; after that,

which bodies are kept safe in war?

وَسِهامُ لَحظِكَ لَيسَ يُدرِكُها الفَنا

هَطَلَت فَقُلتُ العارض الهتانُ

And the arrows of your glance can never be exhausted;

they rained down, and I said, 'A cloud pouring torrents!'

ما في الشَمالِ مَواقِعٌ لَكَ تَقتَضي

خَلَفاً وَما لي في الجُنوب مَكانُ

You have no positions in the North that require

a replacement; and I have no place in the South.

لَكِ في المَشارِقِ مَطلَعٌ مِن نورِهِ

أَجدِ الهُدى وَبِهِ الضَليل يُعانُ

Yours is a rising in the East; from its light

I find guidance, and by it the lost one is aided.

ها نَحنُ في عَصرٍ بَهيجٍ رائِقٍ

في الشَرقِ لا ظُلمٌ وَلا عُدوانُ

Here we are in a joyful, serene age;

in the East there is neither oppression nor aggression.

فَتَرَفُقي لُطفاً بِمغرمك الَّذي خَلَع

العزار وَهَزَّهُ الهَيمانُ

So kindly be gentle with your lover, who has cast off

the bridle and been shaken by love's delirium.

طالَ الدَلالُ فجارَ في إِحكامِهِ

فَهِبي الوِصالَ لِتَنقَضي الأَحزانُ

Your coyness has lasted long and grown unjust in its hold;

so grant union, that sorrows may end.

ماذا عَلَيكَ إِذا سَمحت بِزورةٍ

وَبِرَشفَةٍ يَحيي بِها الوَلهانُ

What would it cost you to allow a visit,

and a sip by which the lovesick one revives?

لا تَختَشي مِن قُرب خلك وَاِربعي

فَالوَقت صافٍ وَالمَكانُ جِنانُ

Do not fear your beloved's nearness, and rest at ease;

for the time is serene, and the place is full of gardens.

لِمَ ذا التَباعُد وَالنفار مَع الجَفا

جُوراً وَنَحنُ عَلى الصَفا إِخوانُ

Why this distance and aversion, along with coldness,

so unjustly, when we are companions in pure affection?

هَذا دَمي فَأَروي الثَرى مِن سَفكِهِ

فَعَسى تَخف بِسكبِهِ النيرانُ

Here is my blood; drench the soil with its shedding,

so perhaps, through its pouring, the fires may subside.

أَو بَردي مِن ماء ثَغرِكَ غلَّتي

فَعَلى رِضا بِكِ أَنزل الرُضوانُ

Or cool my burning thirst with the water of your mouth,

for divine favor has been sent down upon contentment with you.

لا تَرفُضي قَلبي الذَبيح فَإِنَّهُ

لالهِ حُسنِكِ في المَلا قُربانُ

Do not reject my slaughtered heart, for it is

an offering to the god of your beauty before the assembly.

هَذي يَدي فتقي بِعَهدي دايِماً

قسماً بِلُطفِكَ ما أَنا خوانُ

Here is my hand; always trust in my pledge.

I swear by your kindness: I am no betrayer.