أضالع تنطوي على كرب — Ibn Anin

أَضالِعٌ تَنطَوي عَلى كَربِ

وَمُقلَةٌ مُستَهِلَّةُ الغَربِ

Ribs enfolding anguish,

and an eye pouring forth tears,

شَوقاً إِلى ساكِني دِمَشقَ فَلا

عَدَت رُباها مَواطِرُ السُحبِ

in longing for Damascus's dwellers; may

rain-bearing clouds never bypass her hills.

مَنازِلٌ ما دَعا تَذَكُّرُها

إِلّا وَلَبّى عَلى النَوى لُبّي

Homes whose remembrance never calls

but my heart answers, despite the distance.

مَتى أَرى سَيِّدي المُوَفَّقَ يَختا

لُ ضُحىً في عِراصِها الرُحبِ

When shall I see my lord al-Muwaffaq strutting

at forenoon in her spacious courtyards?

يَمشي الهُوَينى وَخَلفَهُ عُمَرٌ

يَختالُ مِثلَ المَهاةِ في السِربِ

He walks leisurely, and behind him ‘Umar

struts like an oryx cow amid the herd.

وَسيدي كُلَّما تَأَمَّلَهُ

تاهَ وَأَبدى غَرائِبَ العُجبِ

And whenever my lord looks upon him,

he grows vain and displays bizarre conceit.

تَجَعمُسٌ قَلَّ مَن يُناظِرُهُ

في الناسِ إِلّا تَعَنفُقُ الرَحبي

A pompous swagger few can rival

among men, save al-Rahbi's affected strutting.

المُدَّعي أَنَّهُ بِحِكمَتِهِ

عَلَّمَ بقراطَ صَنعَةَ الطِبِّ

He claims that, through his wisdom,

he taught Hippocrates the art of medicine.

وَهوَ لَعَمري أَخَسُّ مَن وَطيءَ التُر

بَ وَأَولى بِاللعنِ وَالسَبِّ

Yet, by my life, he is the basest man to tread the dust,

and the most deserving of curses and abuse.

وَلَو رَأَيتَ المِطواعَ يَنظُرُ في الـ

ـتَشريحِ كَيفَ الفَقارُ في الصُلبِ

And if you saw al-Mitwa‘ examining

anatomy—how the vertebrae lie in the spine,

وَكَيفَ مَجرى الأَنوارِ في عَصَبِ الـ

ـعَينِ إِذا ما اِنحَدَرنَ في الثُقبِ

and how rays of light pass through the nerve of the

eye, as they descend through the aperture!

وَإِنَّ في لُكنَةِ اِبنِ عَونٍ لَما

يَشغَلُهُ عَن فَصاحَةِ العُربِ

Indeed, in Ibn ‘Awn's accent there is something

that keeps him from the Arabs' eloquence.

وَلِاِبنِ نَجلِ الدَجاجِ طولُ يَدٍ

تَجمَعُ بَينَ الفُراتِ وَالضَبِّ

And Ibn Najl al-Dajaj has a long hand

that brings the Euphrates and the lizard together.

يَقودُ رَضوى إِلى عَسيب وَلا

يُعجِزُهُ ما اِرتَقى مِنَ الهَضبِ

He leads Radwa to ‘Asib, and

no lofty crag defeats him.

ثُمَّ أَبو الفَضلِ مَع حَماقَتِهِ

يَقطَعُ عُمرَ النَهارِ بِالضَربِ

Then Abu al-Fadl, for all his foolishness,

spends the day's whole span in beating.

وَالمغزلُ الحَنبَلِيُّ مُجتَهِداً

يفتلُ في لِستِ الثقَّالَةِ الكتبي

And al-Mighzal the Hanbali, working hard,

twists in the arse [reading uncertain] of al-Thaqqala the bookseller.

هذا وَكَم غادَرَ المُؤَيَّدُ ذا الـ

ـخَليطَ بِالدِبسِ لاثمَ التُربِ

This—and how often al-Mu’ayyad has left this

mixture with molasses kissing the dust!

وَلَو أَشا قُلتُ في المُخَلَّعِ ما

فيهِ وَما عفتُ ذاكَ مِن رُعبِ

Had I wished, I would have said of al-Mukhalla‘ what

is in him; I did not hold back out of fear.

لَكِن أَيادٍ لِعِرسِهِ سَلَفَت

عِندي وَحَسبي بِذِكرِها حَسبي

But his wife has done me favors before,

and recalling them is enough for me—enough.

كَم عاثَ بِاللَيلِ في الفِراشِ عَلى

كرومِ بُستانِ شُفرِها

How often he ran riot at night in bed upon

the vines in the garden of her labia.

عَلى اِستِها خِرقَةٌ مُعلَّقَةٌ

كَطَيلَسانِ اِبنِ مُكتَعِ الحَربي

A rag hangs upon her arse,

like the mantle of Ibn Mukta‘ al-Harbi.

وَأَسمَرٍ كَالهِلالِ رُكّبَ في

غُصنِ أَراكٍ مُهَفهَفٍ رَطبِ

And a dusky youth, crescent-like, set upon

a slender, tender arak bough—

صَبا إِلَيهِ عَبدُ اللَطيفِ وَلا

غَروَ لِذاكَ القَوامِ أَن يُصبي

‘Abd al-Latif fell for him; and no

wonder that such a figure should captivate.

وَفي حَديثِ اِبنِ راشِدٍ زَبَدٌ

عَلى لِحى سامِعيهِ كَالشَبِّ

And Ibn Rashid's speech has froth

upon his listeners' beards, like alum.

وَاِبنُ هِلالٍ إِذا تَنَحنَحَ لِلـ

ـغِناءِ يَعوي مُشابِهَ الكَلبِ

And when Ibn Hilal clears his throat for

singing, he howls just like a dog.

حَلقٌ وَضَربٌ يَستَوجِبانِ لَهُ

مُعَجَّلَ الحَلقِ مِنهُ وَالضَربِ

A throat and a beat that earn him

prompt shaving and a beating.

وَلِلنَفيسِ الصوفيِّ عَنفَقَةٌ

مَحلوقَةٌ لِلمِحالِ وَالكِذبِ

And al-Nafis the Sufi has a tuft below his lip,

shaven for trickery and lies,

كَلِحيَةِ المُرِّ كُلَّما حُلِقَت

نَمَت نُمُوَّ الزُروعِ وَالعُشبِ

like al-Murr's beard: whenever it is shaved,

it grows like crops and grass.

مَعايِبٌ حجبُهُنَّ يَهتِكُها

هتكَ بَناتِ الرَقِّيِّ في الحُجبِ

Faults whose veils he tears apart,

like the ravishing of al-Raqqi's daughters behind curtains.

ما إِن رَأَينا مِن قَبلِهِ مَلِكاً

يَسيرُ في مَوكِبٍ مِنَ القحبِ

Never before him have we seen a king

proceed in a retinue of whores.

يَثِبنَ نَحوَ الزُناةِ مِن شَبَقٍ

كَاِبنِ زُهَير البَرغوثِ في الوَثبِ

They leap toward adulterers out of lust,

like Ibn Zuhayr, the flea, in his leaps.

وَلَو تَرَدّى النَزيهُ مِن حَبلٍ

قَباً لَأَضحى مُمَزَّقَ القَبِّ

Were al-Nazih to don, made of rope,

a robe, he would end with its collar in tatters.

وَالعِزُّ عَبدُ الرَحيمِ سَيِّدُنا

مُطَيلَسٌ لِلقَضاءِ بِالشربِ

And our lord al-‘Izz ‘Abd al-Rahim

is mantled for judgeship in fine linen.

يَظُنُّ رائيهِ أَنَّهُ جُرَذٌ

مُطَلّعٌ رَأسَهُ مِنَ الثَقبِ

Whoever sees him thinks he is a rat

poking its head out of a hole.

وَخُطبَةُ الدَولَعِيِّ كَم جَلَبَت

لِلنّاسِ مِن فادِحٍ وَمِن خَطبِ

And al-Dawla‘i's sermon has so often brought

people grievous calamities and disasters!

يَؤُمُّهُم إِذ يَؤُمُّهُم جُنُباً

فَلَيتَهُ أَمَّهُم عَلى جَنبِ

He leads them in prayer, when he does, ritually impure;

if only he led them lying on his side!

تَخَشُّعٌ ما وَراءَهُ نُسُكٌ

يَصدُرُ عَن نِيَّةٍ وَلا قَلبِ

A show of humility, with no worship behind it

arising from intention or from the heart.

وَلِلمُسَمّى بِأُمِّهِ لَقَبٌ

مِثلُ أَبيهِ المَنعوتِ مِن كَذِبِ

And the fellow named after his mother has an epithet,

like his father, falsely described:

سوءٌ كَسوءِ الفاعوسِ ذي القرنِ وَالـ

ـمَعروفِ بِاِبنِ البَرادِعي المُربي

evil, like the evil of horned al-Fa‘us and

the man known as Ibn al-Baradi‘i, the usurer.

كَأَنَّهُ ضامِنٌ وَمَنزِلهُ الحا

نَةُ لَو كانَ ظاهِرَ الشَربِ

As though he were a tax-farmer, and his house a

tavern, if his drinking were open.

وَعَن أَبي الدُرِّ إِن سَأَلتَ فَسَل

لِاِبنِ سَليمٍ يُنبِئُكَ بِالخَطبِ

And if you ask about Abu al-Durr, ask

Ibn Salim; he will tell you the tale.

لَهُ عَلى البابِ خادِمٌ وَوَرا الـ

ـبابِ قِحابٌ تَلقاهُ بِالرُحبِ

He has a servant at the door, and behind the

door, whores who greet him warmly.

تَسحَقُ هَذي لِهَذِهِ فَتَرى

شَهيقَ هَذي مِن شَهوَةِ

This woman rubs against that one, and you see

this one's gasping with desire.

وَعِلَّةٌ لِلبِغا مُحَلّلَةٌ

مَعاقِدَ الأُزرِ مِن وَرا النُقبِ

And a pretext for whoring, undoing

the knots of waistcloths from behind face-veils.

حَمَينَ بِالنُقبِ عَلوَهُنَّ وَما

حَمَينَ أَسفالَهُنَّ مِن نَقبِ

They protected their upper parts with veils, but did not

protect their lower parts from penetration.

وَالعَسقَلانِيُّ في عَمامَتِهِ

دَلائِلٌ عَن سَخافَةٍ تُنبي

And in al-‘Asqalani's turban

are signs that proclaim foolishness.

كَأَنَّها فَوقَ رَأسِ قِمَّتِهِ

دَوّارَةَ الحَلِّ رخوَةَ الهُدبِ

As though, above the very crown of his head, it were

a loose-wound coil with limp fringes.

يُخادِعُ اللَهَ في الزَكاةِ بِأَلـ

ـفاظِ مِحالٍ لَم تَأتِ في الكُتبِ

He tries to deceive God over zakat with

words of trickery absent from the books.

ذو طَرفَينِ إِذا نَسَبتَهُما

يَحارُ في ذاكَ كُلُّ ذي لُبِّ

A man of two sides—when you trace their descent,

everyone with sense is bewildered by it.

فَالأُختُ وَالأُمُّ مِن بَني شَبقٍ

وَالأَبُ وَالإِبنُ مِن بَني كَلبِ

For sister and mother are of Banu Shabaq (Lust),

and father and son are of Banu Kalb (Dog).

وَحينَ أَبصَرتُ دَولَةَ الأَحدَبِ الفا

ضِلِ أَربَت عَلى عُلا الشُهبِ

And when I saw the rule of the hunchback al-Fadil

surpass the heights of the stars,

فَقُلتُ لِلمُفلِسينَ وَيحَكُمُ

تَحادَبوا فَهيَ دَولَةُ الحُدبِ

I said to the penniless: Woe to you!

Make yourselves hunchbacks: this is the hunchbacks' reign!